Ketupat & Co.

The Difference Between Being Nice and Being Good Malaysians love being nice . We smile automatically, apologise unnecessarily, avoid conflict like it’s contagious, and say “it’s okay” even when it absolutely is not. Being nice is socially rewarded. Being nice keeps the peace. Being nice makes you likeable at kenduri, tolerable at work, and invisible in arguments. But being nice is not the same as being good—and confusing the two is how we end up with polite societies full of unresolved problems. Being nice is easy. Being good is hard. Nice people don’t speak up when someone cuts the queue. Good people do—even if it makes things awkward. Nice people laugh along with offensive jokes to avoid tension. Good people shut it down and accept the discomfort. Nice people avoid saying “no” and quietly resent it later. Good people say “no” clearly and deal with the consequences upfront. Niceness is about comfort. Goodness is about integrity. The problem is that niceness is perf...